lighter-girl

I always keep a lighter in my bag. Always.
Besides of practical purposes like burning down houses and corpses in any time needed, there is more to this little habit. Light is not only meant for me. It is meant to be transmitted, it is a breath of energy, it is in its nature to change forms and never go out. 

My first thought of a lighter is a shallow and almost helpless romantic one: it is around midnight or long after, I am with my friends or alone in the asleep city, listening to the loud music playing in my head, noticing the dopamine running through my veins, tasting life; when you see me.
You ask for a lighter and I grab my bag, feel the cold metal of the demanded tool and then your warm rough hand in mine, while im passing it over. I become the saviour of your night. You light your cigarette blowing off the lovely fading smoke, thinking about the mysterious pretty poet, who lent you her lighter. I'm your lighter-girl. 

However, it then hit me like a thunderbolt: I'm more, I'm not just the lighter-girl. I prefer to think of me as a recipient of calls and whispers from different dimensions, realities and eras by passing over this exquisit light, this gift to another soul made like mine. For short moments, as soon as I receive the light, I'm lit, my whole existence, body and mind, flame up in a state of ecstasy, all my senses are aroused- life is so vivid that it makes me dizzy. The second I transmit the light, I go out, I fade, yet i'm letting another human being experience this striking happiness and aliveness. It seems like putting on special glasses that allow them to appreciate life through a golden veil, turning everything to liquid gold, helping them forget all cruelties and hate bearing them for a heartbeat, awarding them with hope.
To please the cliche, I'm bringing light into your darkness. 

I'm your bridge to paradise, I'm an eager guide, an attentive recipient, a female Hermes.
I see the light for you, who can't yet- always willing to hear the faint whispers in life.
Can this be my meaning? 


lighter-girl

https://open.spotify.com/track/5zZt5BzzSrUXwytlRatvc2?si=022443f55f7b461a

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